Loving vacation

We are loving vacation!!! Patrick is doing great! I think it's helping us feel more comfortable taking him places and not being so nervous! And he seems to love being on vacation! He must be a beach baby just like his momma!!!

Merry Christmas and happy 4 months

I started this on my phone the other day and it wouldn't let me type anything. So here we are a few days late. Our Christmas was spent in route to Florida. Patrick did fantastic on the drive and flight. Only a few minutes of tears on the plane. And he slept so well Friday night. Poor little guy was so tired!! So far he's enjoying our beach vacation. Sleeping in the stroller or baby bjorn as we walk the beach is a favorite pastime. And hopefully the weather will cooperate and stay nice!! I'm sure the rest of the week will fly by!!

Christmas eve was spent with the in laws. I don't even know where to start with them so I won't. I swear they get weirder and weirder every time they come over!

And Patrick is 4 months old!! He goes back to the doctor a week from tomorrow. I'm curious about his weight. He still is wearing some 0-3 months clothes but mostly 3 months. Some 3-6 months, but not many. So he has a limited wardrobe right now. He has started grabbing things and putting them in his mouth (mostly toys and wash cloths). And he has learned how to grab the handle on the pacifier and take it out and sometimes get it back in. And he LOVES to suck on his hands!! He'll even suck on my hands or arms if his mouth is close enough to them.
Sleeping continues to baffle us. Some nights he goes to bed really easy and sleeps all night and other nights he seems like he'll never fall asleep or he wakes up once or twice. I realize we are very lucky. He mostly sleeps all night or only wakes up once. And when he does sleep all night its 12-13 hours, but I hate guessing what the night will bring. So far on our trip he's done really well (knock on wood). I hope it continues!!!
He's getting really good at sitting up and holding his head up. He loves to sit on our laps and look at books or the tv or other people. He doesn't seem to like to be facing us anymore. Apparently we're too boring. But he seems to really enjoy looking at books. A few weeks ago he wouldn't really tolerate them for very long. But his attention span is getting longer and longer.
In my mind I always assumed he'd start on solid foods right after we got back from Florida since he'd be 4 months old. But the more I read about it, I don't think he's ready. He does seem more interested in what we're doing when we're eating, but I don't think he's interested enough to sit up on his own and eat from a spoon. And the last thing I read said that once the baby doubles their birth weight, they are ready. He's no where near doubling his birth weight. So I think we'll lean towards waiting until 6 months or so. He's still nursing every 2-3 hours but my supply is fine and he seems to be getting all he needs. So I don't want to mess with that yet. And he'll be 6 months before we know it! I will ask the doctor what they recommend though.
He seems to have a little separation anxiety starting. I'm not sure if that is because one of us is always around or if that is just an age thing. But if we leave his line of sight, he starts fussing. We are trying to not hold him or carry him around all day to avoid what we affectionately call 'lap colic' but it's hard! Working in the morning and then being home with him in the afternoon, you'd think I'd have plenty of time to get stuff done, but that doesn't seem to be the case! Some days I feel like I get nothing done!!! But I also know that he will only be this age once and if I don't get the floors vacuumed or kitchen cleaned up, who cares. I get to spend time with my baby and that is all that matters!!! And I'm thankful that I'm able to do it!
Overall he's growing well and learning everyday. He's a great baby and a wonderful addition to our family!! We fall more and more in love with him everyday!!! Who knew being parents would be this amazing!!!

Busy busy

Christmas is coming...less than a week away! Means we have too much to do! Work was busy last week. I have friends coming for a visit tomorrow. Meeting up with out of town friends on Tuesday, Christmas with the in-laws at some point, and Florida on Friday. I spent today re-arranging my kitchen cabinets. Why? I don't know. I should have been cleaning for guests, baking cookies, packing, resting....anything but that. But at least it's done and I feel better about it. I have a little more cleaning to do for tomorrow. I will start packing probably Wednesday. I'm off Thursday so I can work on it then too.

Patrick will be four months on Friday...I can hardly believe it. His 4 month appointment is two weeks from Monday. I'm curious about his weight. We've been tracking it on the wii fit plus and it doesn't look like he's gaining much. But he eats plenty and he is healthy, so I'm not worrying about it right now. He also almost turned over yesterday. Dean caught it in a succession of pictures. He said it was funny. He got all the way on his side but then couldn't figure out what to do. I was bummed I missed it. The downside to being at work! But hopefully when he rolls for real I'll be home. He's also learned to squeal. He squeals when he's happy and when he's not. And it can get LOUD!!! It's sort of funny, but still loud!

I realize I didn't do a 16 week post, so this is sort of making up for it. I probably will be better at just doing monthly posts now. The weeks are running together for me. I will hopefully update when he learns something new! But as for now, I need to pump and go to bed.

One year ago...

...(yesterday) Dean and I got the best news of our lives. Who would have thought a year would bring the most wonderful, most challenging, most loving little being into our lives. I cannot imagine life any other way. And even though he's in there hollering on his play mat as I type this...I would not change one single thing. I love my family. My wonderful husband and sweet little boy. In my mind it couldn't be better. And I thank God everyday for this gift.

15 weeks old

As I sit here typing, my sweet 15 week old boy is upstairs in dreamland. He went through a spurt of not sleeping last week but that seems to be behind us now. He's back to his old habits. It's been a big week for Patrick. His first snowfall (YUCK!). I hate the snow, but love thinking of years from now when he will be so anxious for snow to go out and play.

He's growing like a week. Most all of his 0-3 month clothes are too short. I measured him the other day at 23 1/2 inches. He doesn't seem to be gaining any/much weight, so he looks thin to me. But he'll fill out. He is grabbing at his toys more and more. And when he touches one he laughs like it's the funniest thing on the earth. He is definitely developing lap colic. He HATES to be put down. I suppose because we love holding and cuddling him so much!! He has started stretching out his feedings to closer to 2 1/2 hours apart, which is nice for me. We are all decorated and ready for Christmas. I still have some shopping to do for the little guy but not much. We won't be going overboard since he's only 4 months old!! I plan on only getting stuff we actually need anyway.

And just to keep me on my toes...I started my first postpartum period today. Fun huh? Maybe that will explain my moodiness and lack luster attitude these days. Having so meting to blame it on just makes me feel better, even if it's not the reason! Maybe once this passes I can start to feel better mentally...we'll see. If not, I may be heading to the doctor. But for now I'm heading to bed and hoping that this snow will stop overnight so I can drive to work without freaking out!!! A girl can dream right??

The week from hell

As far as I'm concerned this week can be forgotten...never to be discussed again. My kid stops sleeping through the night, we put our family pet to sleep, I had a major mental breakdown in front of my mother in law, and got in a car accident....pretty much the worst week ever. Thank gosh it's the weekend. Thank gosh I don't have to go anywhere (not that I can, I have no car) and thank gosh my husband is the most wonderful man in the world!

I'm going to bed early tonight and will sleep in tomorrow. The sun will rise on a brand new day and it will be better than this one!!

Goodbye Rags

It was a sad day in our family yesterday. My mom had to put our family dog Rags down. As anyone with pets knows, this is hard on anyone. My poor mom was a wreck. She was sick from chemo and then made this decision. I felt so sorry for her. But poor Rags wasn't doing well and has been declining for weeks. My parents have always been fair to their/our animals and not prolonging life when the quality wasn't there. It's still sad. And I know she had a hard time today too. Constantly looking on the bed where she slept most of the day. Waiting for her to come to the dishwasher after dinner. And I'm sure the bed feels a little bigger without her there during the night. She was a good dog and a great pet. And now she's in doggy heaven chasing deer and rabbits to her hearts content!

I stand corrected

Patrick's sleeping schedule is NOT going well. He's been up the last 2 nights to eat and the night before this he wouldn't go to sleep. I'm hoping this is a growth spurt and he will go back to his normal sleeping schedule soon. I'm so tired and getting up to go to work is killing me!!

Anyone with any tips, stories or support please let me know...

14 weeks old

Yet another Tuesday is upon us and my sweet boy is 14 weeks old. I'm a little biased but I swear he gets cuter every day!! We've been working on the bedtime routine. He's been pretty good about going to sleep and staying asleep. Although last night he wanted to party at 3am and the night before he wouldn't settle down until 11:30. But I'm hoping that is a fluke and he'll go back to his good sleeping habits tonight. It's HARD to get up and go to work when I'm exhausted!! I don't know how some moms do it!! I am lucky he's a good sleeper.

He's learned that he would rather be sitting up than laying down. And preferably sitting up on one of our laps. I'm working on putting him in his bumbo or swing rather than laying him down. And trying to avoid holding him ALL the time. Although it's tough because he's such a good cuddler! And I know someday he won't want me to cuddle him.

Dean weighed him on the Wii fit plus today and it gave the same weight as his 2 month appointment (11 1/2 pounds). I initially was worried but am telling myself that it's a different scale and the boy eats enough!! Still every 2 hours or so.

I've been having some feelings of doubt or fear that I'm not doing everything I should be for him. I think I read too much and listened to too much advice and now it's all backfiring on me. I worry about his bedtime routine, sleeping through the night, eating - how often and how much. I think I inherited my grandmas worry gene!!

But despite all that he is growing and healthy. Couldn't ask for anything better!

3 months old

I cannot believe 3 months is gone. I know I say this every week/month but seriously...it is flying by. And now that the holidays are here...these next few weeks will probably go even faster.

Updates on the babe...he's growing like crazy. He seems to get longer everyday! He's officially grown out of some of his 0-3 months clothes but still a little small for his 3-6 month size. So he may look like a rag-a-muffin for a few weeks. He's still eating about every 2-2.5 hours. I'm pumping at work and he's getting 3-3.5 oz at a time in the bottle. He's sleeping through the night about 12 hours (give or take some days). Nap time still needs some work. He doesn't usually nap for more than 30-40 minutes 2-3 times a day and so the evening is no fun for everyone. He cries because he's tired but we are trying to keep bedtime around the same time each night for the sake of our own sanity. But he's been going to sleep much easier (because he's exhausted). So we will work on nap time. Pumping is going pretty well. My supply seems fine (thankfully) and he seems to tolerate whatever I'm eating. Overall he's a healthy growing boy and that's all we can ask for!

So three months after giving birth I am feeling pretty much back to normal. I still have 8-9 pounds of baby weight to lose (and then another 10 infertility pounds after that!) But I haven't been too diligent about my diet and working out. I keep telling myself I'm going to, it lasts for a week and then I fall off the wagon. Sex still isn't too fun. I think mostly because I'm too tired to care. And I'm nervous about getting pregnant again (who'd have thought I'd ever be nervous about that!) Mentally I'm feeling good. I have bad days here and there but nothing to be worried about. I think it's been a pretty easy road so far but I don't want to jinx anything. It could turn around at any time. And I'm sure our next baby will not be this easy!!

We're headed to Dean's aunts house tomorrow for Thanksgiving. There will be 24 people there which is way too big for my taste. My family is small, we never had a big holiday dinner so it's quite overwhelming for me. My parents are going to a friends nearby so I may try to escape with Patrick for a little bit to go see them. Their friends haven't met him yet, so that will be fun. Better get back to my baking.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!! We have so much to be thankful for in this house....

13 weeks old

Has it really been a week since I've posted? Where does the time go??? I used to get a lot of my playing done at work but now that I'm only there 4 hours a day I feel the need to actually work :)

Since tomorrow Patrick will be 3 months, I'll probably do most of the update then. But today he spent the morning with my mom. The first time he's been without one of us since we left the hospital. Sort of sad! But he did great with her. And she loved watching him. Not that she could or would want to watch him full time, but I'm glad she likes to do it for special occasions!

Work is still going ok. The drama will always be there, I guess I have to get over it. But I'm really enjoying only being there 4 hours a day. By the time I'm annoyed with the place it's time to go home!! I love it!

Three month update tomorrow.

12 weeks old

Again a day late, but none the less, our little guy is 12 weeks....closing in on 3 months! Our schedule and routine is still going well. I think we're all adapting. Patrick has been spending the mornings with daddy both at home and the golf course. He's been learning the ropes.

As you can see he's a champ in the seat. He is learning to sit in it longer and longer each day. He loves for me to sit with him and hold up his toys so he can inspect them. He still likes his play mat. He has found his voice and loves to 'sing' to his toys that hang. It's so funny to listen to him. He gets louder and louder....so cute. I'm sure in a few months I'll be regretting that but for now it's cute! He finds the tv so intriguing. If he's fussing, I will hold him so he can see it and he quiets right down. It's a little weird, but whatever works to clam a fussy baby. He's still eating about every 2 1/2-3 hours, which seems like a lot to me, but he sleeps about 12 hours at night, so he has to make up for that. And he is starting to grow out of his 0-3 month clothes:-( I'm not ready to pack them away yet!!! But it will happen soon!

He's growing so much and we are all learning more about each other every day. The last 12 weeks have been so fun. We can't imagine what our lives were like before!

Quiet Sunday

I'm not used to having 'weekdays' and 'weekends' after being off for 2 months! It didn't really matter what day it was. But I am quickly remembering how much I enjoyed a nice quiet Sunday! We even went out to breakfast this morning. Not quite as relaxing as I remember, but still nice!

So now I'm going to clean up a bit, enjoy a warm cup of hot chocolate and scour the web for Christmas presents for my husband!

11 Weeks old

I missed the post yesterday but the little peanut is 11 weeks old! I've been back at work for a week now and everyday it is getting better. I think Patrick is now figuring out that the routine has changed a little too. He has been sleeping through the night for about a month now but woke up twice since I started back. He seems fussier in the morning now that he's with daddy. Everyone keeps saying he'll get used to it. I guess we all will.

He is tolerating tummy time better. And we're trying to remember to put him on his tummy more! He's turning his head better. He had a tendency to keep his head facing left. Would hardly ever turn it towards the right. But he has now even started sleeping with it facing right...yay! The doctor said we'd give it a few more months but if he didn't start doing it on his own, we'd have to go to PT. I'm glad he's doing it on his own. He seems more interested in toys. He doesn't seem interested in us reading to him at all. I think he's too young but I still try! And lastly, he's started growing out of some of his 0-3 months clothes. Not all of them yet, but a few are very close to being too short! Hard to believe he'll be 3 months old in 2 weeks. He's growing fast and we are falling more and more in love with him everyday!

300

Nope, not the movie...300 posts. I have been thinking about what this post should be about, what we've been through since I started this blog. It's been almost 2 years now of writing about my life and our journey to have a family. I can honestly say that all the negative things I wrote and thought are completely out of my mind now. I have a beautiful baby boy who brings joy to our lives and I can't imagine life any other way. The journey wasn't always fun or easy but it was worth it. Every tear, every penny, every thought....completely worth it. We are two of the happiest parents around. So I hope this post full of happiness, thankfulness and love will replace the ones full of negativity, pain and tears. Because everyday I spend with Patrick all those negative thoughts go further and further away.

Please tell me this gets easier??!!??

First Day Back

To work that is...not so fun. I had a very tough day yesterday just preparing for this. I really didn't want to leave Patrick. And I am not a huge fan of my job anyway which makes it that much harder! But it wasn't as bad as I thought. I'm only working part time, and a half day actually goes by pretty quick. It's usually the afternoon that drags on anyway. There were just a few tears this morning before I left. But after that we were good. And Patrick isn't up before I leave anyway. I feel like that makes it easier. It would be so hard to leave if he were crying or needed me right then. So I hope he can continue to sleep til 8 or later!

I was worried about the crazies that I work with...I knew they'd pull something...I just didn't know what. The craziest of them didn't speak to me. Barely said hello, didn't say welcome back, didn't ask about Patrick or how we were doing. Ok, great. So I just went on with my business. I keep telling myself that I'm doing this for me...no one else. I'm done doing things to please other people. I'm doing things to please myself and my family. So I'm basically doing everything in my power to ignore her. I was also worried about pumping. We don't have a secluded place for such activities so I had to do it in the bathroom. Sort of gross but I'm not giving up nursing just because I have to go back to work. So I brought a chair in from home and there's a small table in there already. It was fairly boring, but went quickly and was uneventful. Thankfully no one asked me about it....yeah, the crazies are WAY too personal! And if anyone says anything about it, I'll just point out that it is my right to pump. I don't know how I would do it if I worked all day. I think it would be a lot more stressful and difficult. Kudos to those women out there who do!

So now I'm home with my happy, smiling baby (well, he's actually napping right now!). I couldn't be happier when I'm with him. I will have to remind myself of that everyday when the alarm goes off. And I am glad I started on Wednesday so the weekend is only 2 days away. And Thanksgiving is 3 weeks from tomorrow....YIKES! How'd we let that sneak up on us. But it's a short week and we'll be happy for that!

Now time for me to rest. Getting up early and being forced to think all morning is going to take some getting used to!

Baby's first Halloween

We aren't the type to really celebrate Halloween. We don't have very many neighbors so we don't get any trick or treaters. But I couldn't help but buy this little teddy bear outfit/sleeper for Patrick to wear. Since I knew we weren't going anywhere or having anyone over, I didn't buy an actual costume. Maybe next year. Anyway, here is the picture of the little guy. He wasn't quite sure what we were making him do!

I am heading back to work this week. I'm having a hard time with it. I keep thinking that if I didn't work for my family, I would probably be staying home with Patrick. And my mom is trying to make it seem better by telling me that I'll probably enjoy being out of the house. Not the case. I don't really mind being home. And I love being the one to go and get my baby when he wakes up in the morning. As it is now, I'll be gone long before he wakes up in the morning. I'm not big on prayer but I have been asking for the strength to do this. I think I honestly thought that when the time came, we'd figure something out. And I'd be staying home. But the time is here and that's not happening. Maybe for the next one....maybe. But for now, I'll just keep asking for the strength to get me through.

9 weeks and 2 month well baby checkup

Patrick is healthy and growing. What every parent strives to hear!! He had his 2 month well baby visit today. He's weighing in at 11 lbs and 7 ozs. Measures 23 inches long (or 24, he was pretty wiggly!) and took his shots like a champ. I think he really didn't like being held down, but he seemed to recover rather quickly from the shots. He's been a little extra fussy today and sleeping a little more, but I think he'll bounce back just fine! The doctors office was full of sick kids though. We are being hit hard with the flu etc. A lot of schools were closed last week and continue to be closed this week. I just wish parents would keep their sick kids in the 'sick kid waiting area'. But we kept Patrick covered up and hopefully kept all the germs away!!

I also got the proofs back from our family pictures. They are great and I can't wait to go through them again to pick the ones we like the best!! I think I'll go look through them right now while Mr. Patrick is still asleep!!

2 months

Happy 2 month birthday sweet Patrick! It's been a great month! He has met some new friends, gone on a few outings to the park, pumpkin patch and grandmas house, had friends over to the house and received so many wonderful gifts. We had a great time at the pumpkin patch and really enjoyed the fall weather. We haven't had much of that this year. It's back to cold and rainy now. Patrick is growing bigger. We have 1 sleep 'n' play that is too small now. I'm sure there are more to follow soon! He is going back to the doctor on Tuesday for a check up and shots. I'm a little nervous to take him to the doctor because of the major outbreak of the flu here. Dozens of schools have been closed last week due to illness and I'm sure that doctors office is crawling with germs! We are still working on the sleeping/napping situation. For the most part he is sleeping through the night. He woke up one night, but he didn't even seem that hungry and wasn't really crying. So who knows what that was about. He has had a few nights that he doesn't want to go to sleep which is far more frustrating. I think it's because he's over tired. He doesn't like to nap and by the end of the day I think he's just tired. But last night was the worst. He cried and cried and I couldn't get him to settle down. So in the midst of him crying, I was crying and pleading with him...like that will help. But I think a momma breakdown was just what I needed. I'm not really the emotional type, but it had been building up. But he's napping better today, so that's a plus.

We booked our flights to Florida for Christmas last night. Another reason for my meltdown, but that's a different story. I'm excited to be going, but of course nervous. At least I know the place really well (we've been going there since I was 8). And it's a laid back vacation with my family. Spending most ever day at the beach or pool. I'm nervous about going out to dinner since the evening isn't our best time, but it's still 2 months away, so it could be different by then.

I've been looking into mommy and me swimming classes but we can't do them until he's 6 months old. So now I want to look for something else. I plan to work part time (which starts in a week and a half, boo!) in the morning. And I think most activities are in the morning. I'll probably start looking a little harder after the 1st of the year. Once I get an idea of how all this is going to go. And don't even get me started on going back to work. I'm already dreading it. I am dreading the people, being away from Patrick and being tired. Every aspect of it!! I'm sure there will be many posts about my dislike for work!

Well I had better take advantage of this new found nap time!!

Mommy needs wine

It's been a long night of screaming. Not sure why but every time someone comes for dinner he has a major screaming fit. I'm thinking of banning dinner guests until he can figure this out....because my head hurts now. I guess I should go help daddy give him his bottle and get him ready for bed. Tomorrow is a new day right??

8 weeks old

And again another week gone by. Patrick is smiling more and more and seems to really enjoy the toys that hang from his play mat. He's starting to 'talk' more and more when he's playing too. I love hearing those little baby sounds! So sweet. Yesterday we went to the pumpkin patch. It was finally a nice day and I really wanted to at least get a picture of him with a pumpkin! Even though he won't remember or care, it's just something I wanted to do. And then we went to my moms to hang out for the afternoon. I'm still not great at taking Patrick out and about, I'm always worried he's going to have a breakdown or be hungry or something. I'm getting better, but not great. And now with all this hype about the swine flu, it makes me even less excited about taking him places! I went and got my flu shot today (my first ever) and am on the list to get a call when they get the swine flu shots in. I'm not against vaccines but I've never had a reason to get these until now. I can't imagine being sick with a baby....it would be a lot harder! Especially THAT sick! So for now, I'm in serious hand washing/sanitizing mode and trying to avoid any type of illness. Now that being said, Patrick has his 2 month doctor appointment in a week. I am going to do everything I can to keep him AWAY from all those germy little kids!

In other baby news (and I hope this doesn't jinx it for me), Patrick has been sleeping through the night for a week now. We had one night that he didn't want to go to sleep, but he still slept 8 hours. Other than that, he goes down between 9 and 10 and gets up between 7 and 8. I consider myself lucky, not sure if it's something we're doing or if he's just a good sleeper. I'm sure we'll have times where he does wake up, but for now, I'll take it. He isn't really napping during the day, so maybe when that changes his night time schedule will too.

I'm still in countdown mode to going back to work. And dreading it more and more each day! The people are still bat shit crazy and every time I hear a story about one, it makes me less and less excited about the idea of going back to them everyday. I'm trying really hard not to think about it. I still have 2 weeks to enjoy my sweet boy!!

Today

Today is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Rememberance Day. I can't imagine my life without Patrick, but will rememeber the previous two pregnancies that ended too early.

Please keep all the families who have had their lives changed, turned upside down, by infant loss in your thoughts today.

7 weeks old

Another week gone by. Patrick is growing and learning every week. He's started smiling at us and acting like he recognizes us more and more. He loves the toys that hang down from his play mat but he's not too interested in the rattles we hold for him. He loves the music and lights on his play mat too. And he seems to like music in the car, it quiets him down when he's crying! He's growing so fast, soon he'll be sitting up and crawling around, yikes!

We had family pictures yesterday. They went well, although Patrick had enough after about 45 minutes. But I'm sure we got some good ones! I might try to do a little photo shoot of my own one of these days.

I went into work for a quick meeting this week. It made me really realize I have no interest in going back there! The drama and bullshit is too much for me to handle. I'm glad I'm only going back part time. But I go back 3 weeks from today...boo. I'll have to make the most of it while I'm still home!

Exciting times!!

We had a little bit of excitement around here last night!! We've been trying to do more tummy time lately (mostly because I keep forgetting!) Anyway, last night Patrick made it quite apparent that he was having no part in it!!

We kept flipping him back over and he would roll right back! It was too funny. And of course super cute!! And so we got the video camera out...I mean what else is it for??

And then, to top it off, the little guy slept through the night. Granted I'm pretty sure I heard him talking to himself in his bed til at least 11. But I was in bed too and he slept til after 7!! I woke up at 6:15 in dire pain (I'm pretty sure milk was coming out of my eyes!) and realized he hadn't woken up! Pretty cool. I think that's the 3rd time since he's been born. I don't expect it to be a common occurrence yet, but hey, I'll take it when I can get it!!

6 weeks old

Another week gone by. This one was quick because of our trip to California. We're back home and back to normal...well as normal as it can be with a baby!

Updates this week:
Patrick seems to notice us more. And he follows my voice around the room if I'm not holding him. He's getting really good at tracking toys and watching our faces. His hands have found his mouth. I catch him sucking on them all the time (and I don't say 'catch' like it's a bad thing, I don't care if he sucks on his hands!). It's actually really cute.

I've been out a few times on my own this week too. It's been nice to get away but I miss the little guy when I'm gone. And of course I'm worried about how he's doing, if he has enough to eat, when I'm going to get home to feed him or pump...always worried about something! But not worried enough to skip going out to get my hair done. It's been WAY too long and I need it. Plus we're getting family pictures done next week. A good friend of ours runs a photography business and gave us a session for my baby shower. Such an awesome gift. Although I'm sure we'll be buying tons of pictures from her!! I'm so excited for it, but nervous of how I'll look on camera. I know it's not that big of deal, but body image is tough on women. But I'm mostly excited to have really good pictures of Patrick!!

I had my 6 week postpartum visit yesterday. Everything looks normal. My incision is looking good and ute is back to normal size. She said to give my finger a few months (yep, months) before resizing my ring...because it still doesn't fit. She said some people's fingers never go back to normal size (crap!) And we talked birth control. She wants us to wait at least 6 months before trying again to give the incision etc time to heal. She gave me the options of con.doms (or other over the counter stuff), the mini-pill, or IUD. I do not intend to get pregnant before the 6 months is up, but I'm not sure what I want to do. I don't want an IUD. I'm sure it works for some people, but I don't want to have something put in me that doesn't need to be there. And then have to go back and get it taken out. And we've never been the con.dom type. And I know several people who have had real trouble with progesterone type birth control. It causes increased appetite (i.e. weight gain), moodiness, and other emotional issues. We need to talk about it more and make a decision. I'm going to go ahead and fill the prescription and go from there.

The only other thing weighing on my mind right now is going back to work. No one has asked me about my thoughts or plans about it. My dad is at a conference right now, but when he gets back next week I plan to talk to him about it. I'll feel better when it's all figured out.

Well, better take advantage of nap time!!

Tips for traveling with an infant

1) Don't do it.

Just kidding. Sort of. Our trip to CA was fine. Patrick did great on the way out there. He stuck to out MI time pretty good. It was nice for me because I could put him to bed pretty early and still have some of the evening to visit and relax. However when he was up at 5am for the day, that was a little rough! I opted out of a lot of excursions my mom and aunt took. It's just too hard to be gone all day with a baby. Worrying about when/where he'll eat, will he get enough sleep, be comfortable enough etc. The list goes on. I did venture out to my grandmas apartment one day. And we did go shopping one day. Other than that I basically hung out at my aunts house with him. The trip home was an entirely different story however. We left Thursday at 9 am from my aunts house. We had a shuttle come get us because we didn't rent a car. Got to the airport around 10 and went right through security. The line was short and we didn't want to risk it by waiting. Our flight left at 11:50 but I would rather go through security in an organized fashion rather than try to rush! Everyone is super helpful when you have a baby though. Makes it a little less stressful!!! We get back to the gate to find out our flight is delayed to 1:45. UGH. So we wait. Then they decide we can board at 12:45. So we load up our stuff and get on. Patrick is crying and we're just trying to get to our seats. I nurse him and he goes right to sleep. The pilot says we're leaving at 1:10. At 1:10 he says we're delayed an hour. At 2:00 he says we're delayed another hour. At 2:30 they tell us we can get off the plane if we want. Then they change their mind. At 3:00 they tell us we have to get off the plane. So we load up again and get off. At 3:15 they re-board. We get settled and push back from the gate (wahoo!) Only to end up on the runway for another few minutes while they figure out what the weight of the plane is. We finally take off around 3:45. We're supposed to get in around 7:00PT/9:00CT which means we'll have missed our flight. And of course there are no other flights out of Minneapolis to Kalamazoo that night. But the agent told us that most flights have been delayed due to the weather and so maybe ours was too. We get land and de-plane. They have printed boarding passes for flights on Friday because of course our flight has left already. It actually left on time. The next flight we can get on is 7:50 on Friday night. So my mom talks to a very nice gate agent and he re-books us on a 7am flight to Midway. At least then we can rent a car and get home! So by the time this is all done it;s 10. Patrick is hungry again and so are we. We found a restaurant in the airport that has decided to stay open later than normal because of all the delays! So nice!! I go feed Patrick in the family room (a wonderful room for nursing mothers!!) and my mom got us a table. He fell asleep and we got some food. There's no hotel attached to the airport so the gate agent suggested we sleep in the family room since we'd have to be back at the airport by 6 (and could also avoid going through security again!) So we did. They offer small mattresses to passengers so we got a few of those and hunkered down in the family room with a few other people. Of course I couldn't sleep. Worried about my baby and our stuff and not sleeping on a real bed made for a long night!! Finally 6am rolled around and we headed for the gate. Got on the plane and took off for Midway. My wonderful husband met us there and took us home. I was worried about either of us driving since we basically got no sleep. We walked in the door at home sometime after noon ET (9am PT), 24 hours after we'd left my aunts. The.longest.day.ever!!! But I must say, Patrick did really good. He hardly cried and put up with everything so well. I couldn't ask for a better baby!!! It made it a little easier on all of us!!

Despite the travel issues, the trip was fun and I enjoyed visiting with my aunt and grandma. I can say, however that I don't know if we'll be traveling again anytime soon!! I think I'll enjoy home for now!!

5 weeks old!

Another week gone by! I can't believe it. Our trip to CA has been great. I've managed to keep Patrick on MI bedtime, which makes dinner time tough around here. But I think it's a good idea to at least try! It will make going home a little easier! I however have not been staying on MI time, so I'm not getting near enough sleep. Although the little guy must have known because he slept great last night! It was fabulous!! I hope he keeps that up when we get home!! The daytime schedule is a little off though. He seems to be sleeping a little more during the day and I'm not sure what the reason is. But he seems happy and he's eating plenty, so it should be fine.

As far as developments, he has started focusing on our faces more, following my voice and watching me from wherever he's sitting. He's also following toys that we move slowly in front of his face. He doesn't follow them for long, but I think it's a good step. He's moving a ton, constantly kicking his legs and moving his arms. His eyes are finally opening really wide. Although I've noticed he only has tears coming out of his left eye. And it's also goopy (I know, not a medical term). If he's been crying, it's worse. It doesn't seem to bother him though. I am a little concerned that the right eye doesn't tear as much (if at all). That was the eye he kept closed most of the time for the first few weeks. I am debating calling the doctor. I might wait til we get home. For now we're just keeping it clean with warm water.

My sweet boy is getting so big. I can't wait for Dean to see him on Thursday. I bet he looks a lot bigger to him! And I know he misses his little boy! And he only has 1 more week of coaching, so hopefully he'll be able to hang out with us a little more after that!! I want to get as much family time in as I can before I have to go back to work!!!

1 month

Happy 1 month birthday to my sweet baby boy. I cannot believe it's been a month!! We're in California right now. The trip out here was great. He did so wonderful, I was so happy! He only got fussy as we were getting off the plane in San Francisco. I was impressed! But he proceeded to be fussy for the rest of the night. I put him down at his Michigan bedtime. But that meant a long night for me. Although I was up at 4:30 because I'm used to getting up before that in Michigan. And I went to bed at 8pm CA time. Can I just say I HATE time changes?? We'll all probably get it figured out by the time we're ready to go home. And then we'll have to do it all over again! Oh well. I'm giving it a few more days, but I hope it gets better. I feel like everyone is just watching me and waiting to see what I do with him when he's crying. And of course the opinions...I'm sure anyone who's visited family with their kids knows what I'm talking about. My mom, aunt and grandma all giving me their opinions. And think that if they hold him, he'll quiet down. Um, sure. Oh well. I am going to do my best to relax and go with the flow. Patrick seems to do better when I'm relaxed anyway.

On another note the LPGA tour is playing at my aunts golf course. So I hope to go out there and watch either tomorrow or Sunday. I've been saying I want to go to a ladies event some day and now I have the chance!! I think Dean is a little jealous. Although he's playing at Whistling Straights on Monday...a pretty exciting opportunity for him!!

Well, I had better get some rest while Patrick is sleeping.

4 weeks

My time sure does fly!! My maternity leave is half over :( I wish insurance grew on trees so I could stay home!!! Little Patrick is growing and getting more active. He loves to kick his legs and flail his arms around. When he moves his legs it looks just like he's running. And he is really good at kicking his covers off at night, even breaking out of the swaddle!! He already hates his arms in, but apparently hates his legs in too. I'm just worried about him being too cold! He's making more noises that aren't crying sounds while he's awake. And he's starting to focus on our faces. He will follow my voice when I'm not holding him. It's so cute!! Every week he's changing and growing! It's so fun to watch!

On Thursday I'm taking Patrick to California. I can't believe I'm doing it, I'm nervous as could be about traveling. But I feel like I need to introduce him to my grandma before something happens to her. And I know it would mean a lot to her. And from what I've heard/read, it is actually a little easier at this age. They don't mind being held and I can carry him anywhere. Not like when he's 2 and won't want to sit in my lap and would rather be running through the airport rather than in a stroller. So I'm hoping for the best but preparing for the worst. The time out there will be fun though!

Well, better get back to the laundry and packing!! Wish us luck this week!!

3 weeks old

I can't believe 3 weeks ago I was just getting to the hospital with the anticipation of having our first child. I guess it doesn't really feel like 3 weeks because we've only been home for 2, but time is flying!! The days are starting to feel a little more 'normal' and don't go by quite as fast. Little Patrick has put himself on a decent schedule. He is up between 6:30 and 7 until about 10 when he eats again and then takes a good nap til 1 or 2. We're still working on the afternoon. He sort of naps on and off til 6 and this is probably why he gets so fussy in the evening. We don't have a very good feeding schedule after he gets up in the afternoon. But he then goes to bed for the night between 9 and 10 and sleeps til between 2 and 3. So I am feeling very lucky that my sweet boy sleeps so well at night and lets his momma get a good 4 hours at a time!!! SO LUCKY!! He's growing everyday. His eyes are open wider and he really looks at us now. He seems to follow us with his eyes every now and then. He seems to like us to read stories to him, but he does NOT like his mommas singing! I wouldn't either, but he really lets me know it!

So the things we need to start working on are the afternoon/evening feedings. He's still mostly sleeping in the living room. I need to remember to put him in his crib for naps so he can get used to it and hopefully start sleeping there overnight. This was my one must before we had him. I didn't want him to sleep anywhere but his crib. But the c-section put that on hold. I couldn't carry him up/down the stairs and I didn't want to be running up/down them all day/night either so we didn't have much of a choice. He doesn't seem to sleep as well up there, but hopefully that will change. I need to train myself to put him up there for his naps and he needs to learn to like it. And lastly, I need to start working on pumping more to build up more of a supply. I feel like I feed him a lot anyway, so to pump on top of that seems daunting. Some days it's easier than others, but for the most part, I hate it. But it's nice to have those bottles on hand for evening fussy time!!!

Well, I had better take advantage of nap time and get a shower and do some housework.

2 week appointment

Patrick had his 2 week appointment yesterday. He did great! He's gained back his birth weight plus some. He's up to 8 pounds 15 oz and 20.75 inches long. Even his head grew and is 15.75cm around (in the 75-90th%...even though that means nothing). I was in the 90th% for height when I was a baby and I'm just under 5' tall. So I guess since he's gaining so well I can stop worrying so much that I'm not providing enough food for him. He's obviously eating pretty well. And all our concerns seemed normal to the doctor. He was great, I really liked him. Pretty laid back and took the time to listen to our questions and give real answers, not just blow us off! We go back in 6 weeks and Patrick will have to get some shots (boo!)

I also had my 2 week incision check yesterday. Everything looks fine. I got the ok to drive and (carefully) carry him upstairs. I haven't done it yet but will soon. I go back in a month.

We took Patrick to the golf course yesterday to show him off and we even ate lunch in a restaurant (a quick one, but still....our first outing). He did great. Slept the whole time!! He woke up about 2 minutes from home because he was hungry. Overall a great day! He's such a sweet baby (I'm a little biased!) and I love him more and more each day!!

Speaking of love, just want to throw it out there that Dean has been the best father and husband a girl could ask for these last 2 weeks. He's so kind and thoughtful towards both of us and I absolutely love him for it!!! He has made this transition so easy!! Don't know that I could do it without him!

Hospital Stay

Well, we've been home for a week and I've been thinking about writing this but every time I sit down to do so, something else comes up. So here we go....

After delivery, I stayed in the recovery room for a while hooked up to monitors and a morphine pump (yay!) That night is sort of a blur of drugs, nurses and sleep. We ended up sending Patrick to the nursery for a few hours around midnight but he came back around 3 to be fed. Wednesday I was able to get the IV taken out, get rid of the morphine and the catheter. It felt good to be unattached. We hung out with Patrick all day and introduced him to all our visitors. My parents, friends, coworkers, Dean's mom and aunt. It was a pretty good day. He ate pretty well and seemed content. He went to get his circumcision in the afternoon and was pretty fussy after that (wouldn't you be??) Wednesday night the nurse noticed he was breathing quite fast. We thought it looked about the same as before and no one mentioned it, but she wanted to get it checked out. So she called the resident pediatrician on call and he came down to look at him. The decided not to do any blood work because of the circ. It would show inflammation for sure. They were worried about some kind of inflammation/infection in the lungs. Overall it was a rough evening, he didn't want to eat and obviously didn't feel good. Thursday went pretty well. We didn't have any visitors until late in the day. Which was nice. We could just be together as a family. Then Thursday night the same night nurse was on and was still concerned about his breathing (odd to me how none of the day nurses seemed concerned). She was taking him to the nursery with Dean to weigh him and somehow they got talking about the delivery, breaking my water and the nurse saying it was tinged. She checked the chart and there was nothing listed about it. So she called the resident pedi again and they ordered blood work and an x-ray to rule out any kind of lung infection. The x-ray was 'inconclusive' and the blood work came back with elevated levels of inflammation (at 4.9 which is about 8 times the normal .6) So between 2 resident pediatricians and 2 nurses, they decided he needed to go to the NICU and have antibiotics administered through an IV. Of course I was scared and wasn't ready to let them take my baby. They gave us a few minutes and we sat together and cried. I've never seen my husband cry, and it was the saddest thing I've ever seen. We were both scared and felt quite alone. We went with him to the 4th floor and the nurses there were wonderful. He had a room and they got right to work on the IV. They got it in his arm on the first try and he promptly pulled it out. So they tried again, no luck. Tried the other arm, no luck. At this point he was screaming. No amount of sweeties (sugar water) or pacifier was going to calm him down. He was NOT a happy boy. By this time it was well after midnight. I was exhausted and still quite sore. And seeing my poor baby being poked and held down was too much. I couldn't watch anymore and stepped outside to cry in the hallway. Dean stepped up and tried to calm him but at this point it wasn't working. Finally by about 3am they got it in his little head. After a few minutes with him cuddling and getting him to sleep, we went back to our room. A short few hours later we were up, showered and back with him. Not much you can do when your baby is hooked up to all those cords. Later that day they needed the room for an emergency and moved him to the step down nursery. Which is a good thing. It's for those babies who are healthier and probably on their way home soon. We were still waiting for the blood cultures to come back to show any growth. So in the meantime we just hung out with him and did the best we could to comfort and feed him. Feeding didn't go so well. He didn't want to eat, cried a lot and was basically miserable. I didn't know what to do. The nurses were telling me to just keep feeding him and the lactation ladies were telling me that he was doing great...apparently they missed the screaming fit earlier! So after a VERY emotional day, we decided to call it a night. I think I cried more that day than I had in a very long time!! My doctor actually let me stay in the hospital an extra night so we could be closer to him. Saturday was another day of hanging out in his NICU room. We had a different nurse who was much more helpful. They were all nice, but she really helped me understand more about the feedings, taught us a few things (how to take his temperature, use the bulb syringe etc). So that made us feel better. I got discharged around 3 or 4 and we went back to Patricks room to wait for the doctor. They didn't really know much more, still waiting for the 48 hour blood culture (although the 24 hour showed no growth). We headed home for the first time in 5 days without our new baby. It was sad, scary and not how I expected. We got some sleep and headed back up the hospital around 10. His CRP blood work showed the inflammation had gone down, so that was good. Still waiting on the culture. The doctor came in around noon and said he could go home. He said there was no way to tell whether the CRP was showing inflammation from the circ, from infection, from the bellybutton, who knows. They also didn't know if the antibiotics were what brought the numbers down or if they were just coming down on their own. So we watched a few movies on safety, RSV, car seats and shaken baby, gave him a bath, learned a few other things and by about 4 we were ready to go. We packed him up in his little car seat and headed out as a family. A very happy little family!! Finally home, all together....not sure what to do next!!!

It was a very scary few days. Not knowing what was happening or why. But we feel like we got excellent care. And we learned a lot. The additional learning has helped a ton since being home. We weren't scared to give him his first bath, weren't scared to change his diaper, get him dressed, anything. The NICU nurses showed us everything! So even though it was scary for us, being part time parents for a few days really helped us transition into being full time parents. And now, he's growing, eating like a champ and overall a happy baby!! I'm glad this is behind us, but I'm sure I have plenty of years to worry about the little guy!

Patrick Dean is here!

Patrick Dean was born on August 25th at 3:37pm via c-section....let's start from the beginning!! I woke up with contractions around 1am on Tuesday. I wasn't sure they were contractions or just stomach pains (i.e. they didn't hurt that much). But after waking up every half hour until 2:30 I realized this might be it. I couldn't sleep anyway so I got up and tried to read anything I could about what was happening. I hadn't had any other 'pre labor signs' up until now, so I didn't really believe it. But the pains kept coming about 20 minutes apart. As the night progressed they did get closer together. By 6am I decided I was waking Dean up to tell him that I was pretty sure this was it. I had started spotting and the contractions were closer together. He was excited and quickly got up. Not that there was any hurry, but we both showered and got ready just to be on the safe side. By about 9:30 they were 5 minutes apart and for the most part uncomfortable. I called the office and they told me to come in. We got there around 10:30 and after being checked was 5 cm dilated already (woohoo!!) They sent me straight to labor and delivery. They knew I wanted an epidural so they were ready and waiting since I was already so far along. They didn't waste any time. I had one nurse doing the IV's and one asking all the questions. This process took a few hours (labs, IV's, fluids etc). The epidural was fine. It didn't hurt and went quickly. The only small issue was the nurse anaesthetist did it with the doctor telling her what to do....a little scary for me! The doctor came in about 2 and checked again, I was barely to 6 and my contractions went from every 2-4 minutes to every 5-6 minutes. Not the direction we want to be going. So they started me on pitocin. With the medication, I couldn't feel the contractions (yay!) but apparently they weren't progressing like the wanted. Shortly after that we noticed the baby's heart rate (now being monitored from the inside) had dropped to about 50. We called the nurse and they all came flying in. I changed positions and it came back up but then proceeded to drop after every contraction. Not that low, but low enough to be concerned. At 3 the doctor came in and said he suggested a c-section. We could wait it out but with the heart rate issue he wouldn't. So I agreed and by 3:20 I was in the OR getting my stomach scrubbed. I couldn't feel anything except pushing and pulling. Which I'm not going to lie, it hurt. I was scared and crying. I didn't really get enough time to process everything and I was scared! All the talking and directions was scary and it sounded like they had a hard time getting him out. I kept hearing 'push harder'....not pleasant!! Until I finally heard that little cry. My sweet baby boy! They whisked him over to the cart to measure and weigh him. Dean took pictures and they brought him to me as soon as they were done. He was beautiful. They finished stapling me up (yeah, real metal staples....yuck!) and I was in recovery by 4. All in all it was a quick ride. I had to stay there for 2 hours. It went by quick and had just a few bumps in the road. The anaesthesia made me sick and throwing up with an incision across my belly was not fun. Especially on an empty stomach. But holding that little baby made everything better! We were moved to our room about 6....both in shock that we are finally parents!!! The best feeling in the world!!!

So the delivery went great. My baby boy was 8 pounds 12.6 oz., 20 inches long. His head was 14 cm which lead everyone to believe I would have needed a c-section anyway to get him out! He is a healthy little boy!! We were planning on going home on Friday....but nothing is ever easy! I'll update the rest of our stay later. Right now baby Patrick is just waking up!

Last Day of Work!!!

My last day of work for 2 months (give or take)...I can't believe it. I really can't believe we're going to have a baby....I know we've been doing this for 9 months, but when it comes right down to it....yikes! A baby, any day now, I can hardly stand myself!

Work was beyond shitty. The crazy one I work with was basically a bitch all day. I don't know if it was directed at me because I am leaving, or if she was just having a bad day, but either way it was frustrating and annoying. She hates it when the attention is on someone else...and right now, it's not on her. I can say however that it made me so glad today is my last day. I had a fleeting thought of going in for half days next week since we didn't get any news yesterday at the doctor. But I reconsidered this morning. I deserve a few days to myself. And then after her behavior...it sealed the deal! So I'm done for now. If we could just win the lottery or found insurance that grew on trees I probably wouldn't be going back at all. But that's another topic all together.

I'm still hoping to have the little guy as soon as possible...this weekend even if he'll cooperate. But we'll see. I'm feeling a little more at ease now. Feeling like I can wait it out. So we'll see how long that lasts. For now, I plan to have a restful and relaxing weekend....and we'll just wait!

39 Weeks

Holy crap....39 weeks. That means that in a week (give or take) I will have my sweet boy. I can't wait. No, honestly...I cannot wait. I am SO ready to have this baby. I have been having lower back pain and a little bit of cramping (think menstrual cramps). But nothing significant. We go back to the doctor tomorrow afternoon. I am hoping I'm somewhat dilated. And plan on asking him about stripping membranes. I hope he is open to the idea...

Nothing new to report this week. Hopefully have something new to report tomorrow. Keeping our fingers crossed:-)

Single digits!!!

First off I can't tell you how excited I am to be in the single digits!! I'm hoping this little boy is punctual and doesn't make me wait longer than 9 days. I haven't had any contractions or major signs of labor. My back did however start hurting yesterday afternoon, which I have read can be a sign. So we'll see. I'm basically over being pregnant and just want to meet this little guy. It's really hard to sleep and be comfortable just about anywhere! So maybe after our doctors appointment on Thursday I'll have a better idea!

The only worry I have right now is getting the stomach flu....yep, the throwing up...etc, stomach flu. Dean was complaining of not feeling good last night and I was exhausted so we went to bed early. Less than an hour after laying down, he leaped out of bed and proceeded to throw up for the rest of the night. Poor thing, he felt awful. And there wasn't much I could do for him. He stayed home today (which I'm sure was about killing him!) I talked to him briefly and he said he might take a shower (a step in the right direction). I'm leaving work at 3 so I'll go check on him and then clean both bathrooms and whatever else he may have touched!! I REALLY don't need to be throwing up all night in my condition!! So hopefully he's feeling better soon and we can both be healthy to have this little baby.

Only 9 days left!! WAHOO!!!

38 weeks and appointments

We had our 38 week appointment. They were running WAY late so we had a different doctor than I expected, which is fine. They had a really hard time finding the heartbeat but she thinks it's because he's laying with his back to my back. I hope he turns around before he comes out!!! But she finally got it and it's at a healthy 160. BP was fine. Weight is fine. I had my first internal check. It wasn't that bad (it wasn't that fun either) but I'm not dilated or anything....boo. So no baby anytime soon. She did say that it could happen anytime and when it does start it could go quickly. But I'm not so hopeful. We go back next Thursday. I'm hoping for a little change!!

Leaving work at 3 or 3:30 has been a huge help! I feel much better by the end of the week, and the days seem to go by much faster! I'm actually leaving at noon today to have lunch with some friends and a massage later! So looking forward to it. And I have big plans for myself this weekend. Cleaning the house and maybe even cleaning out my car! I hope I can get some motivation to get it all done. I have no other plans, so I have no excuse!!

And of course I have to keep thinking happy baby thoughts and maybe he'll start listening to me!!!

One more thing

So I've been worried about my mom having chemo when the baby is due/coming. I realize there is nothing we can do about this, but I can worry anyway. Well, she was supposed to have chemo yesterday which would have put her next treatment on the 31st. And I was starting to think this all might work out. She gets all the way over there (it's a 2+ hour drive to Detroit from here), spends the night and gets to the cancer center bright and early on Monday. They do the preliminary testing and low and behold her platelet count is too low. She can't have treatment if they're below 75. The lowest she's had so far is 78. They were 52 yesterday. A normal persons number is 150-400. There's nothing they can do other than a blood transfusion. And they won't do that until they get as low as 20. So she came home. She was NOT a happy camper. It's a long trip, something she plans her weeks around. Plans how she's going to feel, who is going to watch the animals, what she's going to be able to do etc. So even though it's a slight reprieve, not having treatment this week...it's still frustrating. She will have the blood tested again Thursday and again Monday. If all is well by Monday she will have treatment next Thursday. I felt so bad for her. But hopefully she'll know this time before she gets there if she can or can't have treatment. Then she went on to tell me the precautions she needs to take. If she cuts herself, falls or gets a bruise she needs to go to the ER. If she hits her head, go to the ER. Sounds scary to me. But of course she just takes it in stride. So needless to say, baby or no baby, I'm worried about her. I hope she can start feeling better really soon!!

And it continues....

The in-law saga that is. I swear every time I think these people can't do anything worse, they do. So they bought a farm in Indiana so they could have horses and be closer to the race tracks. They're into horse racing...not my thing, but whatever. They are buying horses like money grows on trees. They've been down there a lot over the last month, he was just there for over a week by himself. He came home for like 5 days and now they're going back. The newest horse is racing Sunday and they don't know when they're coming back. So if the baby comes while they're gone, his mom will probably come back but he won't....WHAT? He's not invited to the delivery room (neither is she for that matter) but still...he's not going to come back to see his first and maybe only grandchild?? I have been worrying/wondering about this now for a while. What they were going to do? How I was going to react? They basically don't give us the time of day unless it affects them somehow. They need us to do something for them or give them something or some holiday is coming up. They never call to see how we are, never call to see if we need anything from them. So I guess I should have seen this or something like it coming.

The worst part is I feel horrible for my husband. He's so excited about this baby. We worked so hard and went through a lot and now we're finally going to be a family. And his dad is being a total jerkface about it. And his mom is too for that matter. I can't be too upset in front of him, I don't want to make him feel worse. My parents are over the moon excited....can't wait, want to know all the details...everything. His parents don't even ask about any of it. I don't think his mom has even said she's excited about the whole process. Ugh, it just bothers me. And I feel so bad for him.

But I guess no reason to dwell on the negative. I know that we are still beyond excited and can't wait to meet our son. If they aren't, it's their loss. Only 15 days left!!! SO EXCITED!!!

Appointments and parties

We had our weekly appointment yesterday. Everything seemed just fine. They keep telling me that 'next week' we'll be starting the internals....but apparently they aren't. According to the nurse they for sure will be doing it at 38 weeks (i.e. next week). So another week of reprieve! I'm actually kind of glad because I would hate to have heard I was 1 cm or even less because I would have worried about it all week! So now I just have to wait and see what next week brings.

Stats were all fine. My BP was fine, weight was up 2 pounds, but not on my scale at home. Still not worried about weight. Babies HB was 148, sounded great! Measuring right on schedule. Head still down. No questions, issues or anything...it was a quick appointment.

Work was busy last week and it's getting harder and harder to sit all day long. I'm thinking of starting to leave a little early next week. It might help me feel like I have more time to get stuff done and not feel quite so tired by the time I get home. We'll see how next week feels. I already have to leave early on Thursday for the appointment and I'm taking a half day Friday. So we'll see. I also need to firm up plans for when I come back with my dad and then 'announce' it to the rest of the office. I don't know why I'm nervous about it. I'm doing what is best for me and my new family and really don't care what they think. Just don't feel like dealing with the drama.

Last night Dean's aunt invited us to come to her house to visit with her kids and grand kids that were in town from Canada. We weren't able to go to the entire family reunion last week because travel isn't too fun anymore. But I wasn't aware that basically the entire family was coming! So there wasn't a lot of visiting going on with Dean's cousins, but it was fun. We had dinner, talked about the baby, caught up a little. Overall it was nice. His mother was there, which is always an experience. She was for the most part behaved, but still says such inappropriate things. I'm learning to deal with it, but it's still frustrating. And now she's decided she's going to give me advice on the baby. Basically I don't want to hear it. She hasn't given the baby the time of day yet, why should I start listening to her now?? Ugh...whatever. The rest of the family was nice!

And today I have big plans for myself. Cleaning, laundry (mine and baby's!), errands, shopping and hopefully have enough energy to make dinner! I guess I'd better get moving! Although the rain we're getting (which is much needed!) is making it hard to be motivated. If the rain continues, I might take a nap later!!

Oh and just because I can't help myself...the ticker is down to 18 days:-)

37 Weeks

and 1 day. I had intentions of writing a post yesterday but between work being crazy busy and then out with a friend last night, I just ran out of steam by the time I got home.

The little guy is the size of a watermelon and the weight of a large mouth bass...nice. He's moving around a ton. I think I feel it more because there's no where for him to go! He likes to push a lot, not so much kick and jab. And as of yesterday he is full term. He could come any day now. He hasn't dropped yet so my guess is he won't be making an appearance anytime soon. I'm really hoping for him to make his appearance on the 20th or 21st so I've been telling him everyday....we'll see if he listens. I don't know why I want that day, just do. But he'll come when he's ready.

We have another doctor appointment tomorrow. First internal...yikes! I'm a little nervous about that, but oh well...Looking forward to hearing his little heartbeat. And then onto the weekend!! Wahoo!

24 days

Wow, that's pretty close to 3 weeks!! I spent the day yesterday in his room getting it organized and cleaned up. I have more laundry to do and a little more work up there. I will try to get most of it done today. Although I woke up with a slight headache, sore throat and stuffy nose. I'm hoping it's from sleeping with my mouth open, but it doesn't feel like that kind of a sore throat. I will be so mad if after 9+ months I get sick. I plan to drink a lot of water and maybe even take a nap this afternoon....we'll see. I have a busy week planned too, so I can't be sick!!

The doctor appointment on Friday went fine. It was another 5 minute appointment. I guess I should be thankful that everything is so 'normal' that they don't need long to see me. He seems healthy, heart rate still 152, my bp is 'perfect' as the doctor said. I didn't even gain any weight last week! Yay for me. I'm still shooting for 40 pounds....we'll see. I have gained about 35-36 so far so I might be going over. But overall I think I've done pretty well. The doctor doesn't seem concerned, so that's good.

We went for a walk last night. It was a little harder than I thought. Swimming is great, but it's nothing like walking! I am hoping to go a few times a week now until he comes. I also want to keep swimming but with the busy week I have, I may just skip it. Getting up that early and then trying to do something after work is really hard. We'll see. If I can walk and swim a few times a week, I will be happy with that.

Private or new blog?

I've been running across several blogs that are going private after their baby is born because of various reasons. The thought honestly hadn't crossed my mind. The only thing that had crossed my mind was setting up a new blog for outside friends/families who don't know about our struggles to get and stay pregnant. I would like to be able to share with them after our little guy gets here....so my question is, do I go private and only allow people I know to read? Do I leave it public and hope that no one has the time or desire to go back and read through all our crap? Or can I move the rest of my posts and start 'fresh' with this one? Or do I just decide that I don't really care and do whatever is easiest?? I'll probably go with the last one because that seems to be the path I've been taking lately.

That's the thought for the day....

36 weeks

27 days left....but who's counting! Things are about the same. Same issues, same fears, same excitements....well, maybe a little more excitement!

~still having swollen feet
~still having numb fingers
~still having a tough time sleeping
~having to pee even more at night (who thought that could happen??)
~still need a few things for this little guy...going shopping this weekend
~still need to clean/organize his room
~still excited...can't wait to meet this little guy
~still nervous about staying over night in the hospital

We have another doctor appointment tomorrow. Should just be a regular appointment. No internal checking or anything out of the ordinary. That will be next week. So should be a quick appointment. I don't really have much to report to the doctor. A few contractions here and there, but nothing note worthy.

I had my last swimming class this week. I'm sort of glad it's over. But it's just one step closer to the end! I'm feeling more and more ready everyday! I know I can never be totally prepared, but I still think I'm ready as I will ever be! I would like to keep him safe inside for a few more weeks....but after that, any time is fine!!

The aftermath

The shower was fun. There were a lot of people there and it was nice to see some of Dean's side of the family. His parents are so weird, we/they don't do a lot with the extended family. So I'm glad we got to do something with them. His mom was only semi-crazy. She basically didn't speak to me. I don't know if she doesn't like me, jealous of me, or just doesn't know how to be social? She seems to talk to everyone else just fine. Sometimes I wonder if she is jealous of my relationship with Dean. Since her husband is such a jerk, I can imagine she wishes things were different sometimes. Who knows. I feel bad that I'm always bad mouthing her, but when I only see her a few times a year and she barely speaks to me, I feel I have a bit of a right to be annoyed. I think I wrote about this before but they bought a farm in Indiana to put their horses on (well the 1 horse they own, they're buying 2 more apparently). And they were there for 8 days, came home last Wednesday and then left again last night and will be home sometime the end of this week. So my question is, are they going to try to make a point to be in town when the baby comes? It's the 1st grandchild....there aren't any do-overs. I hope they understand that. I'm trying to put it out of my mind though....it's not my problem if they choose to not be around.
Anyway, back to the shower, everyone was very nice (except for the 'oh my, your huge' and 'that baby will come any time'....I don't feel that big!) But I guess 80 year old women are allowed to say whatever they want! The food was great, one of Dean's cousins made the cake and it was beautiful. She's starting a little business so I hope I can send some people her way. She made her own wedding cake back in May and it was beautiful and delicious! And of course this little boy got tons of things. A lot of clothes and other things for his room. He's going to be one very loved little boy! Now I have to finish up the thank you cards. I got most of the written, but not addressed. I hope to have them in the mail tomorrow or Wednesday. And then I need to go through all that stuff and see if there's anything I need to take back, exchange or wash. I'm sure a little of all 3! I also need to make a list of the things we still need before he gets here. We have most everything, but still need a few little things here and there. And I'm sure I'll be running to the store tons after he is born. But of course I feel the need to be somewhat organized and prepared!
So overall the day was nice and we both had a good time. I'm glad Dean was able to come and enjoy it with me. I think he had a good time too! Now it's time to try to make it through another week. Can't believe we only have 4 more to go through!! Can't wait!

Baby Shower today!!!

Getting excited for the baby shower today! Hoping for a drama free day from the MIL....

Will update later when I get home!

More appointments

I think I'm going to feel like the doctors office is my 2nd home before too long. We had another appointment today. Had the group B strep test. It wasn't that bad. The doctor last week said they'd check my cervix, but apparently they don't start that until 37 or 38 weeks. I'm glad to put that off a little! The doctor mentioned how swollen my feet are. I think it's because of going to the game, sitting in the car and then sitting in the stands. And it was pretty humid yesterday. They just haven't gone back down. I'll try working on that this weekend! I'm trying to keep them up at work, but it's hard to remember! He also felt around externally on the belly to try to feel the baby. He squeezed the baby's head and it sort of hurt...but the good thing is he's head down. He said that for the most part after 34 weeks, once they go down, they stay that way. So I'm hoping that's the way it stays for me! I think he's been head down for a while though. When he kicks/moves, I mostly feel it up on top and the sides. But from where he was squeezing, I'm pretty sure he hasn't dropped or anything. It seemed pretty high up. But everything else seemed fine. Weight is up (not too happy about that), BP is fine, HB is fine. So overall I think it was a good appointment. We go back next week.

I did ask him about my situation with my mom. She's due to have chemo in Detroit the week of my due date. Now let me preface this by saying I do not want to be induced unless absolutely necessary. I realize that no one can predict when a baby is going to be born. And lastly I know in the grand scheme of things, this is not that big of deal. HOWEVER....it's the birth of my 1st child, her first grandchild and I would like her in the same city as me. So I figured I'd bring it up just to get it off my chest. I told him I didn't want to be induced, I told him I know there's no way to tell when this is going to happen, but I just wanted him to know. And maybe if by my last appointment on the 20th it looks like there's no way I'll be delivering anytime soon, she can go on Monday and get it over with and be home for another 3 weeks. I feel better having them know my situation. Now maybe I can stop thinking about it.

We had lunch and then back to work. Tomorrow is a day of cleaning and laundry and Sunday is the baby shower with the in-laws. I will be glad when it's over. I get so anxious when I have something to do with his parents. Especially after the last shower when she announced she didn't want to/wasn't ready to be a grandma. We'll see how she acts in front of her own family. I am making Dean go with me though, so that will hopefully help. And Dean wants to talk names again. At least to 'try' to come up with a name. I think we're going to start by writing down all the names we like and go from there. And this is going to sound super mean, but I don't really want the first people we tell to be his family who don't even want to be grandparents or have us as a part of their family...I'm a brat, I know. We probably won't even come up with anything anyway.

Well, time to head back to the couch and put my feet up....I don't think they can get any more swollen than they already are!!

35 weeks

Nothing too new to report. Still tired, sore, and crabby. After hearing the story of my aunts friends grandson, I will endure whatever it takes to get this baby to full term. Her baby will have to stay in the NICU for 1-5 weeks depending on how he does. I know it's hard sleeping, my back hurts and I'm for the most part crabby all the time but it's worth it for a healthy baby boy. The belly is getting bigger. He doesn't seem to have 'dropped' yet. I'm curious to see how that changes the shape/size of the belly.

We're off to a Tigers game tomorrow. I'm excited to go. We're hoping for no rain or storms. We're having dinner with my brother too. He has his 2nd round of boards this week so he can't spend the afternoon at the game, but he can do dinner.

We have another doctor appointment Friday. They will do the group b strep test and do an internal check. Yikes. Not exactly pleasant but I'm curious about the whole process.

I need to get some chores done and get ready for tomorrow.

Daddy boot camp

Dean went to daddy boot camp over the weekend. It's a 3-4 hour class just for dads, taught by dads. He seemed to really enjoy it. And he liked telling me all the stuff he learned. They talked about a lot of things we talked about in other classes but also some new stuff. I'm really glad he went. I think he's getting more and more excited for the arrival of this little guy! We even talked names again last night. Still nothing picked out, but we're getting closer!! Apparently Dean doesn't want to pick a name because he's worried he'll find a name he likes better....sort of funny!

Yesterday we went to a funeral of a good family friend. He was 91 and had a good life, but of course it's still sad. But I was glad to be able to be a part of saying goodbye.

It feels like another busy week around here. Work is slow, but outside activities are busy! Swimming tonight, Tigers game Thursday and in law baby shower on Sunday. I'm hoping with these busy weeks, the time will go by faster! I just found out my aunts friends daughter who was due the same day I was, had her baby last night. She didn't want to tell me because I'd be jealous. I want to meet my baby, but this is a bit early!! Maybe in a few more weeks!! But both she and the baby are doing well, so that's good. I don't know if it's genetic or what, but her mom had her and her brother 4 and 6 weeks early too. I'm just glad they're both doing well!

35 weeks tomorrow...looking forward to it!! And hoping for no rain on Thursday!

Happy anniversary

Today is my 5 year wedding anniversary. I can't believe it's been 5 years since I married the love of my life. Time sure does fly. And according to everyone I know with kids, it apparently goes even faster after the baby arrives. Yikes. We have basically no plans for our anniversary. We decided that we didn't need to do gifts although my sweet husband brought home flowers yesterday so they'd be there when I got home. We're going to a Tigers game next week, so we decided to call that our anniversary outing. A big outing, I know! haha. But it will be nice to spend some time with Dean. We've both been so busy, we aren't hardly home at the same time unless it's to sleep!
We had an appointment with the doctor today. Basically all my ailments are normal, there's nothing they can do about it and she didn't seem all that sympathetic! HA. She probably hears pregnant women complain about that all the time. I guess as long as it's normal, I'm ok with it. Not happy about it, but I guess it's ok. We also found out that we have to start going every week now. I thought it was after 36 weeks, but apparently it's now. I have the group b strep test next week and she said they'd probably start checking to see if I was dilated etc next week. Although only being 35 weeks, there probably isn't anything to be checking. So we made all our appointments until our due date. If we need any after that we can make them as we go. It's exciting to see it all down on paper like that! Hopefully the next few weeks will fly by:-) Can't wait to meet this little guy!!

34 Weeks

Apparently things get worse right before the baby comes....I have had an easy pregnancy but these little issues are starting to get me down...I know these are little but right now it's just hard to take
~my 2nd and 3rd fingers on my right hand are numb/tingly all the time.
~I threw up for the first time on Monday night. It hasn't happened again since, but it wasn't that fun.
~My hips are killing me
~I have a shooting pain down the right side of my back, through my butt and down my leg
~I can't go to the bathroom (even with my increased fiber and stool softener regiment). It may be time for some Meta.mucil or whatever it's called.
~I'm not sleeping for shit. I'm up 3-5 times a night to either pee or switch positions. And usually one of those times I can't fall back to sleep. It's great.
~work is sucking so it's making all the rest of this stuff hard to deal with. I don't think it would be that bad if I could get some sleep!!

At least it's almost Friday and I can relax all weekend. We have an appointment on Friday. I plan on bringing up some of this with the doctor, but I'm sure they'll just say it's normal. I only have 6 weeks left. I suppose I can deal with it. I have some fun things to look forward to in the next few weeks, so hopefully that will help keep my mind off of it. And I'm going to try really hard to enjoy the last few weeks of just me and my husband before our lives change forever.

hospital bags and car seats???

So my husband was giving a lesson to these 2 women yesterday and they were asking about the baby and all that goes along with it. Apparently they both agreed that we should have the car seat installed already and the hospital bag packed. The one went on to say that they went into labor the day after they installed the car seat (3 weeks early) and the other went into labor 4 weeks early! Yikes. I know I only have about 6 weeks left, but I thought I had plenty of time to pack and all that. And we were planning on doing the car seat around the beginning of August. Too late? Too early? Who knows I guess. So I decided I would at least start a hospital bag last night. I got a little bag of toiletries, makeup, Tylenol etc packed up. It's not much, but at least it's a start. I do however think I'll wait a few more weeks to actually put it all in a bag.

For now I'm going to finish cleaning the house and then off to run a few errands....hopefully I can get just what I need at Target and nothing extra (yeah right!!)

FRIDAY!!!

I for one am thrilled it's finally Friday. This week has been too busy at work. I enjoy the quiet without the crazy co-worker, but I don't enjoy doing all the work myself. She'll be back Monday, so then I can relax a little more while I'm here. And I have fun plans in the next few weeks, so I'm already looking forward to that. Dinner with friends at our house tomorrow night, haircut (which I need badly) next week, hanging out with good friends on Thursday....hopefully next week will go by fast! And according to my 'plan' 6 weeks from today will be my last day of work! I'm super excited about that. 6 weeks doesn't sound too long!

I'm also hoping to go through some of the baby stuff this weekend, get it washed and put away and organize his room again. Maybe if I do it once now before our next shower, I won't have a huge job in August!!

Hope everyone else has a great weekend too!!

33 weeks

So we're feeling a little better now. Not sure where the mini breakdown came from. Probably just too much going on in my head. Probably will happen again before this is all over with.

Baby is around 4.5 pounds and measuring about 17 inches long. About the weight of an adult duck. He's still moving around in there but it's a different kind of movement. He doesn't have as much space so it's more pushing than sudden jabs. I have been having a lot of bra.xton hi.cks. They don't have any regularity to them and don't usually last too long. But I'll keep an eye on them. I haven't had anymore spotting, so I guess we're in the clear on that for now. I have had a few issues with my feet getting too swollen. Yesterday they were like 3 times their normal size. My poor toes hurt to bend, they were so swollen. But I had swimming and they seemed a lot better after that. I really need to get into a better routine with that. I have been skipping more than I should! So I plan to go on Friday, my regular morning!! Our next appointment isn't until next Friday. For having them every 2 weeks, it does seem like a long ways away. Only 3 more weeks until we go every week! Yikes.

So overall a good week. I must say I do enjoy seeing the days and weeks tick by!! Only 49 days left!! woohoo!!!

Pity party table for 1 please

Disclaimer: If you are currently trying to get pregnant, having a good day and don't want some whiny post to get you down, or just don't feel like listening to it....I suggest you STOP reading right now!

I feel like I've done a pretty good job during this pregnancy rolling with the punches. There hasn't really been that much to deal with. No morning sickness, nothing too horrible to deal with. But I am here to tell you, I'm sort of over it. I'm over the constant nosebleeds. I'm over not sleeping, I'm over the fat fingers and feet. My back hurts, I had the most horrible headache yesterday (which I haven't had a headache in months!). It was so bad it woke me up at 2am and I didn't think I was going to fall back to sleep. I realize that when the baby comes I won't be sleeping much either, but I feel that might be a different kind of not sleeping. I'm tired of people telling me how hot I'm going to be between now and August. Tired of them telling me how bad labor is. Basically I woke up on the wrong side of the bed one of the many times I was out of my bed last night....I'm hoping this will pass as the day goes on.

Now of course I would go through anything to be sure to have a healthy baby. I realize this is just part of the fun, but I'm allowed to have a few days of 'poor me'. It's not always sunshine and rainbows. And right now, it's not.

Happy July 4th!!

Hope everyone has a safe and happy 4th of July! We don't have many plans, Dean is working. But hopefully some fireworks later and a trip to the lake tomorrow. Hoping the weather cooperates!!

Yesterday we picked up our new I.phones. So far I love it. If our old company would cooperate and transfer over our numbers, we'd be all set. I think it will take a little getting used to, but it's fun learning about it and I think it will be quite useful.

Now it's time to get this house cleaned up. Maybe after I can do something fun:)

Long weekend ahead!

I am at the beginning of a long weekend. We have tomorrow off of work and we got out early today....woohoo! We don't have any specific plans but I am going to head to South Haven tomorrow and maybe stop by to see some friends in town from CA on the way. Dean is working basically til dark tonight, most of the day tomorrow and Saturday. So I'm on my own basically. And I think we're going back to South Haven for a boat ride and dinner with my fam on Sunday. Overall it will be a boring weekend, but I will take boring over not working any day! And maybe I can get up some motivation to get some more baby stuff ready!!

Apparently the spotting/discharge issue is over. Haven't had anything since yesterday after lunch. I feel normal for the most part (whatever normal is these days). I will keep an eye out for anything out of the ordinary, but I think it was just a fluke and I'm fine.

Hope everyone has a safe and happy 4th of July holiday weekend!!

Slightly worried

So I'm not sure what to title this post. I woke up this morning to some pinkish spotting. After a normal appointment yesterday, no internal exam and no se.x I was a little concerned. It wasn't a lot and not bright red and has tapered off now to mostly brown and more like discharge than anything else. I'm trying not to freak out but every time there is a twinge or pain in my stomach I of course think the worse. I was trying to wait to see what comes of it this morning. So far it doesn't seem like much, but I still think I should let the office know.

I've read a little online (probably a bad idea) but it said that sometimes you can spot before losing the muc.us pl.ug. Seems a little early for that. But apparently it can happen.

I've been saying I am so anxious to meet my baby and can't wait for him to get here, but I didn't mean this early! If anyone has any stories out there about weird spotting like this....please let me know. In the meantime, I'll call and wait and hope!

32 weeks

Little baby is growing like a week. According to the website updates he is almost 4 pounds and 17 inches long. I can feel him moving around in there a lot! Our latest appointment was yesterday. Apparently all my concerns are normal and she said everything seemed fine. Heart rate around 150. I didn't gain any weight from the last appointment (which seems a little odd to me). I was tired yesterday but still dragged my self to swimming. Only 4 more weeks of that! I still like it but I'm so much more tired now. It makes it harder to want to go.

Still feeling pretty good other than swollen feet and hands. And apparently having braxton hicks contractions, which the doctor seems to think are fine. Looking forward to the holiday weekend (mostly because we get Friday off!) I don't know what we're doing yet. Probably hanging out at the lake. Sounds good to me!

31 Weeks

9 weeks left.....woohoo! I'm getting so anxious even though I have so much time left! Especially now since it's been in the 90's the last few days. The thought of going through 9 more weeks in this heat isn't too appealing.



Baby updates...he's doing pretty well. I had a little scare on Monday. Around 4 I realized I hadn't really felt him move much. I also hadn't had a lot of water, so I sucked down some water and went home to lay down and see what I could feel. I didn't feel anything for about an hour and after 2 bottles of water I thought my bladder was going to explode. Dean was home (which is not normal) so he was tapping on my stomach and I was freaking out. We decided to eat dinner and then maybe that would get him going. Nope...I felt a few little flutters but nothing like I normally do. I decided I would wait another hour and see what I thought and then decide about calling someone. Well, finally around 9 he woke up and was a crazy kid. Kicking, moving, rolling all that stuff. And then he kept it up most of the night and all day yesterday. I guess he was just letting me know he was still there. Silly baby! But he's been fine since.

According to Babycenter he weighs as much as 4 naval oranges (3.3 pounds and is about 16 inches long) and growing like a weed. He should gain about a half a pound a week from now until August 26th. I'm still feeling fine. Sleeping is going a little better (maybe because I'm so tired). Still only up once a night to pee. Work is a struggle. I have no motivation to be here, don't really care to get this stuff done. I keep hoping this will pass, but I can't keep my mind from wandering off to the baby and life after his arrival! i.e look for more senseless posts while I'm at work!!

The constant drama in this office is also making it hard to concentrate. Who would have thought an office with all of 6 people here could have so much drama. One of the crazy ones (as I affectionately call her) got a call from her doctor yesterday that her pap came back positive for H.PV. So she of course told everyone and burst into tears and proceeded to cry for about an hour. Now of course I feel bad for her, what awful news. But would you really share that with your entire office? And then proceed to sit here and talk to everyone you know on the phone? I don't know about you, but I'd probably make up some excuse to leave and make those phone calls in the privacy of my own car or home. So needless to say it was a rough afternoon around here yesterday. And she's of course looking up everything she can find about it and convinced it's cancer. It might be a long few weeks!

On an up note....only 2 more days til the weekend! And our breastfeeding class on Saturday!

Odds 'n' ends

This is going to be a hodge-podge of a post...

Overall the weekend was fun. I spent Saturday putting off my chores and then ended up going to run errands with my brother (anything to get away from housework!!) Saturday night was spent watching the US open. Pretty uneventful.

Sunday we got up and went to breakfast. We usually make breakfast at home, but we had to run by Dean's parents to check on the house since they've been gone for several days. They left their cats and goldfish there (I completely disagree with this!!) I think it's awful to leave those animals there like that alone for so long. But no one listens to me. So we played with the cats, fed and watered them and the goldfish. In the process of changing the water, I realize that there is no plumbing in the kitchen sink....yep, you read that right. The water spicket works, but there are no pipes for the water to run back to the septic or where ever water goes. It just went down the hole and into a 5 gallon bucket. Then I assume they dump the bucket out somewhere. I realize this may be the norm for some people (obviously my inlaws) but this is not the norm for me. And especially having a baby on the way, I look at their house a little differently. It is NO where near child proof or could it be in any way child proof. The floors are filthy (well, everything is filthy), there are nick knacks everywhere and a huge wood burning stove in the middle of the living room with nothing stopping a small child from running right into it. So after discovering the pluming issue it was determined in my mind that our child will not be left unattended (or without me) in their house. If they want to have a holiday or dinner, they can come to our house. That may sound bitchy, but I don't care.
After breakfast and our snooping session at the inlaws (oh yes, there's more...but we won't go into that now) we headed home and I promptly got my housework done. I don't think I've ever cleaned my bathrooms and floors so thoroughly!!! And then watched the US open again. I was (and still am) exhausted from who knows what so I didn't do much for the rest of the afternoon. It was early to bed for me!

The last little tidbit from the weekend was my phone conversation with Deans dad's cousins wife (follow that?). Apparently his mom is serious about this shower and has contracted this woman (who I have met once) to throw it. So we chatted for a bit and got some plans set. I emailed her our list of Dean's family that we have accumulated. And she said she'd probably have a few more people to add to it. It could be quite large....sort of scary. I informed Dean he might be coming to this one with me!! Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful she is doing this for us. It just seems weird to have someone I don't know do all this work for me. But she seemed happy and excited to do it, I hope it wasn't an act! I told her I'd help out as much as she needed. So we'll see. Since I wasn't planning on having a 2nd shower I didn't register for a ton of stuff and I was planning on buying the stuff we needed in the next 8-9 weeks but I guess I'll wait for another 4 to do that. I was a little worried that it was going to be too late for my liking, but as a friend reminded me, it will be something else to look forward to. So hopefully it'll split these 9 weeks up a little! We'll see how it all pans out.

Ok...back to it.