Who would have thought....medical science

Who would have thought it would take medical science to have a baby. I really thought we'd have s.e.x and get pregnant like everyone else. But after the m/c and several months thereafter, I began to realize, not the case for us. When we first went to my OB about it and started the Clomid, I felt relief. Maybe this isn't my fault, maybe there's a deeper issue. So I calmed down. Didn't feel the need to test at the end of every cycle. It was a nice feeling of calm. And at this point, I miss it. This cycle, I'm back up to anxious. No more calm, waiting out the cycle, any of that. After talking to the Dr. about th Clomid not really working, it makes me nervous and if we don't get a + this time around, they're upping the dose. Not that I've had any symptoms on it yet, but another 50mg is a big deal...it could bring me all the symptoms. I know I shouldn't worry about it now, but I can't help it. I just want to know. If anything this whole process has taught me is patience. There's a lot of waiting involved in having a baby or making a baby for that matter.
On another note, the prometrium....I HATE it. I hate the idea of administering it (I'm taking it vaginally this time). It makes me sick just to think about it. I know what you're all thinking, I'm a grown, almost 30 year old woman, grow up. I'm trying, I swear. I've only done it twice so I'm hoping it gets better. But then this morning I woke up with the WORST cramping sensation ever. I get it now and again, always in the morning, and it feels mostly like gas. But it's very painful. I usually try to go back to sleep and it goes away, but I always feel a little tender for a while. Anyway, this morning was bad. I just laid there and moaned...poor Dean thinks I'm dying! But after an extra hour and a half of sleep I'm feeling much better!! Let's just hope we don't do this again!! (Any tips on the administering of prometrium will be greatly appreciated). Oh, and yes, I'd better get over this because in the next cycle or two I may have to give myself shots everyday....I know, I'd better grow up!!
Today I'm going to my grandmas house to help my brother clean it out. She passed away last December and we're working on getting it on the market. My dad has been dragging his feet because it's the house he grew up in, has all his memories, etc, etc. I do feel bad for him, that has to be hard, but he knew it was coming at some point and the house is costing us $$ at this point. I don't know how hard it will be to sell (in this market probably down right impossible!) but hopefully if we get it on the market at least it'll get some looks! The house is a mess, so today will be a big job!
And last but not least, my mom. She went to her appointment on Thursday to get the results of the brain MRI and talk to Dr. L about the plan. The brain MRI came out good (thank God!) no brain METS. Which when you're a cancer patient is always good news. But the Dr. wants her to try to get into the study in Detroit at Karmanos (not sure if I'm spelling that right). But to get in she has to take and fail this other drug Tykurb (again with the spelling). T has been known to cause major GI and intestinal issues. It's chemo in a pill form so she'll have to take it for a few weeks and see how she reacts. It's going to be very hard to take a pill that she knows is going to make her sick! But she isn't going to tolerate it too long before giving up. Dr. L so much as told her to fail it anyway. And then she has an appointment in Detroit in a few weeks to talk to the study Dr. She's not thrilled with the idea of driving over there, it's not far, but more of a pain in the rear than anything else. But she has a lot of friends and family that will help drive with her if and when she needs it. So overall it's not bad news, but not really the news she wanted either. So I guess now we wait to see what the study Dr. has to say (again with the waiting!!)