Happy Birthday

to me:-) The big 3-0 this year!  I just know it's going to be a great one!  Can't wait to spend it with my boys!

Finally 7 months

The last month flew by.  All of a sudden we're at the end of March, Dean's back at work and spring is right around the corner!  And Patrick is growing and learning everyday.  Here's what we're up to now!

~ Sitting up!  It has taken some practice but he's finally able to sit up on his own for short periods of time.  He does better when he has a toy or something to focus on.

~ He still loves standing up. He's even learning that if he pulls up on our hands he can go from laying to sitting to standing.

~ He has milk 5 times a day.  It varies based on what time he gets up but he has 2-3 bottles (5-6 oz) and then nurses the other 2-3 times.

~ We're starting to do solids/purees 3 times a day.  He still isn't interested in finger foods. Maybe in a few weeks.

~ He's finally into some of his 6 month sized clohes.  And I think ALL the 3 month sizes are too small.

~ Still only has 2 teeth

~ Loves reading, singing and watching us dance around for him.  He loves to laugh and smile. Usually only fusses when he's tired or when he wants attention.

His little personality is starting to shine through.  He's been going to work with Dean in the mornings and then I pick him up at noon.  So that gives us a few more opportunities to get out and do some things. He loves all the activity.  Loves looking at all the people, smiling and flirting with all the old ladies!  So cute.  Since it has all been going pretty well I decided that we should go shopping yesterday.  It had been a rough week so I thought a little retail therapy would be good.  My mom and I went to lunch, which went fine.  Shopping however not so much.  First there were no carts.  So I was carrying him which resulted in a leaking diaper. All over him and all over me.  So we went back to the car and I changed him. I decided it was best if I just gave up and we waited in the car for my mom. He fell asleep and actually took a good nap.  I was disappointed but I think this just teaches me that I need to go out more often so I can get better at it. Every time is a learning experience. So hopefully at some point I won't be so nervous taking him out!

Naptime is probably almost over so I'd better get busy doing a few things.  Both Patrick and I aren't feeling well today so it may not be that productive of a day. Oh well...hopefully this week we'll get everything done because we're having a surprise party for my mom on Saturday...wish me luck!  I'm nervous about it and not sure if I'll get it all done!!!

The week from hell and 7 months

Updates soon I promise! 
Until then....my happy boy!

The devil

Day light saving time that is...ugh this week has been awful.  I'm exhausted, despite getting a full night sleep every night) and Patrick has decided that his bedtime routine is no longer what he wants.  It takes so much longer to get him to sleep and to stay asleep.  I don't know if it's because it's light out now at bedtime? Or if it's because of the time? He is back to sleeping later so he's not melting down at 6:30 like he was. So we're letting him/keeping him up later (by later I mean all of 30 minutes or so).  He's still in bed by 7:30.  But tonight it took 20 minutes to get him to sleep...what used to take all of 5.  Just frustrating.  And the sleeping in?  Great right?  Except that I just know that he'll be up super early on Saturday when I want to sleep in...oh well. 

And in other news....we have our 1st case of the missing toy.  And I can't even blame Patrick because he can't move them anywhere yet!  I don't even really care about the toy, but somehow it crossed my mind and now it's driving me CRAZY!  Oh well...I'm on the search for some new toys anyway.  I think he's bored with the ones we have.  I got one today at Target, but I'm not in love with it.  I will keep looking for a few other things here and there.  I'm sure it won't be long and he'll have out grown these little teether/rattle toys anyway. 

Ok, let the evening begin. Thank gosh it's Friday tomorrow!!!

Today I cried

I cried for me, for my baby, for everything and nothing all in one.  

I heard back from the daycare.  The short story is that we aren't going to be able to do 'part time' daycare.  They only consider 8-12 part time.  We just need more than that.  So for 5 days a week at the full time rate I will be taking home about $20/pay period.  Not even enough to fill my gas tank.  So I will be working for health care. Which I realize is a lot, but it doesn't buy food for my table.

I cried for my baby.  I don't want him to feel like I'm leaving him with some stranger.  I don't want him to get sick. I just don't want to do this.

I cried for me.  I don't want to have to be worried about my baby all day while I'm at work.  I don't want to have to feel like I'm working for nothing.

I already feel like I'm not a good enough mother, wife, friend, employee, daughter.  I feel like I give everything I can to Patrick but after that there isn't enough left for the rest.  I'm tired at night so we sit in front of the tv or news paper and hardly talk much less anything else. I don't feel like talking on the phone. I haven't talked to good friends in weeks and owe several people a phone call back.  I do my job but feel like I need to be spending more time there.  And I know my mom needs help but I just haven't offered up my help like I used to.

So there you have it. Today I cried.

Cranky baby syndrome

That is what was going on around here this weekend.  Patrick wanted no one but mommy.  If I was in sight but not holding him, he was crying.  Sometimes even if I was holding him he was crying.  I made sure he was fed, warm, changed and he was still not happy.  I checked his head for fever, checked his mouth for teeth and all was fine.  I think he was just crabby.  Poor little boy.  Hopefully tomorrow is better for him!

6 month well baby visit

I swear I'm going to get better at posting, but when Patrick only sleeps for 30 minutes at a time...I run out of computer time. And to be quite honest I'm too tired at night to care! 

Anyway, while he's still happy in there...the stat were good at the doctor.  He weighs 13 lbs, 10 oz (3rd %), is 25 inches long (10th%) and head circumfrence is 17.5" (75%). So he's still on the small side but he's growing on his own curve so the doc isn't concerned.  He gave us a few things to look for/work towards for the 9 month appointment.  He wants to see him starting to eat finger foods, sitting up unassisted and pulling himself up to standing by then.  All of which I think he will do fine. 

Ok. Naptimes over.  I would promise more updates later...but we all know how that will go:-)

6 Months Old

 So I'm a little late on this one....but the little guy is 6 months old. We are heading to his 6 month appt. tomorrow.  Here's the latest...
~ Sleep - still going well.  He naps 2-3 times a day for about 30 minutes each.  He's even been napping in his crib which is a step in the right direction.  Nightime sleep continues to go well.  He's even been going down a little earlier than normal.  And about 2 weeks ago started waking up between 6 and 6:30 instead of 8 or 8:30 (hence the 3 naps a day!)  But he wakes up happy so that's about all we can ask for.  Last Saturday he laid in his crib playing and singing for an hour!  No crying, no fussing, just playing. 
~ Eating - He's nursing/gets a bottle about 5 times a day. And gets a stage 2 fruit in the morning and veggie in the afternoon.  He still loves all the food we've tried so far.  Since he's been waking up earlier in the morning I haven't been pumping which has made it difficult to get much to freeze. I'm worried my supply is starting to drop but hopefully it's just a little bump. I will keep up with the water and try to eat a little better in hopes it can keep up.  He's still only getting around 6 oz in each bottle but he seems ok with that.  I plan on asking the doctor tomorrow what his recommendations are for increasing solids and moving onto finger foods.
~ Play - Patrick loves to play with his toys.  He would prefer if we were playing with him though.  He's finally decided he likes his exersaucer (for a limited amount of time). He can move it around and play with all the toys.  He still likes his playmat.  And he's has figured out he can pick up something that he wants.  He will stare at a toy so intensly until we bring him to it so he can pick it up.
Other noteworthy things ~
~ He loves to stand up. 
~ He is learning to sit up unassisted. He doesn't quite have it yet, but we're getting there
~ He's getting really good at grabbing at things (toys, glasses, hair, etc)
~ We went out to dinner the other night and he did great.  He isn't too happy to be left in his carseat anymore, so that makes for an interesting meal. But he was happy and did really well
~ He came to work with me yesterday for a while. Not something I would want to do on a regular basis, but it went ok.
~ The drool is back!  If the past is any indication, there may be some more teeth coming soon!
~ He is starting to develop some mommy separation anxiety. And as much as I think this is so sweet, it's also heartbreaking.  Now that he's awake when I leave for work, it makes it really hard when he's crying!!  But it's so sweet when I come home and he reaches for me! 

That's about all for the 6 month update.  I'm sure there is more but for right now that's all I can remember.  I'll try to update tomorrow after the appointment. Here's hoping for some good weight gain (we think there will be, we've been tracking it at home), easy shots and a happy baby!