The touch of a baby

There is nothing sweeter than the touch of a baby. Patrick has discovered our faces.  He loves to pat our noses, put his fingers on our lips and of course grab at glasses and hair.  He is learning with every touch, pull and grab.  Usually I set him straight.  Pull his hand away and say no pulling, no grabbing, no glasses.  But at night it's a different kind of touch.  We have our night time bottle, get ready for bed and say our good nights the same way everynight.  We head upstairs, turn off the light and sit in the rocking chair and cuddle up.  He cuddles his face into the crook of my arm and reaches up and lays his hand on my cheek almost as to say good night, I love you mom.  It brings tears to my eyes as he pulls his sweet hand back to his body, closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep.  I love my boy.  More than words can express. 

Baby's Schedule

Since August everyone asks about the baby's schedule.  How does he eat?  Is he sleeping?  A lot?  In his own room?  Does he roll, have teeth, etc. etc.  And of course we answer these questions smiling from ear to ear, as any proud new parents would.  And as soon as the words are out of our mouth, we hear "that's great, as soon as you get a schedule he'll change it on you"....what?  Why do people insist on taking away your good news by telling you it won't last?  And for the last 6 months we've just had a few weeks of waking up in the middle of the night, or issues eating but for the most part Patrick put himself on a schedule and he stuck to it.  Until now...he's decided that an acceptable time to wake up is 6 am.  Not the usually 8 or 8:30.  I don't mind during the week. I have to get up to pump and get ready for work anyway, but on the weekend???  Um, no thanks. I'll take 8am any day! So I guess all those peeps were right...his schedule finally changed!  Now the question is will it change back??

Snap out of it

That is exactly what I need to do. I've been in a craptasic mood all week.  I am still getting over this cold, which isn't making me feel much better.  I feel like my schedule right now sucks.  I have all this time but yet I feel like I am always rushing.  And I keep thinking in another couple of weeks it will be different, in a another couple of months it will be different...but I've been saying that since August. And yes, things change over the weeks and months but now it's time for ME to change.  It might take a while, but this is my first step.  Admitting it.  Now it's time to work on the plan....just not sure what that plan should be yet.  But I know that to be the best mother I can be, I need to do something!!

Illness, teeth and the last week

I have been wanting to update....but many things have kept me from it. 
First, illness.  Daddy came home with a cold from Orlando. I was diligent about washing hands, keeping everything clean, etc.etc., and of course just when I thought we were out of the woods...boom.  I get sick.  At first I thought it was just a cough, but it turned into a full blown cold.  Awful!  I wasn't sick the entire time I was pregnant with Patrick so I think I had it coming. I'm still stuffed up and coughing but I feel much better.  And despite all our efforts, Patrick is coughing and a little stuffy too. I'm hoping it doesn't develop into much more than that!
Teeth...we have 2!  Two cute little bottom teeth poking through.  They didn't seem to bother him much.  But on top of the cold, he was extra cuddly.  Any mommy loves that!  He's so cute. He throws his arms around us like he's giving a big bear hug. I know he doesn't really know what he's doing, but it's the sweetest thing in the world!  Being sick and having sore gums are no fun, but I'll take the extra cuddles anyday! 
So here we are at the start of a new week.  Looking down the barrel at March, and as everyone keeps reminding me, golf season.  And golf season means daddy goes back to work and Patrick goes to daycare.  I was ok going back to work when I knew he would be at home. But for some reason this is hitting me harder than I thought.  I think part of it is trying to figure out the logistics.  Dean doesn't have a set schedule.  So we need to decide if we are going to have me take him and pick him up everyday?  Which leaves no time for me to do anything before/after work (gym, grocery store, lunch etc) or to try to figure out if Dean can take him and I pick him up later.  Or just how it might work.  He keeps talking about sending him to daycare but everytime I bring it up to talk about how we're going to do it, he won't talk.  It's frustrating.  I don't know if I'm just supposed to figure it out on my own?  Or if he thinks that miraculously one of us is going to be able to stay home or what.  But it's frustrating.  Maybe I'll try the discussion again this week. 
I can see I need to update more...I feel bad having all this stuff in one post, but just one more thing...prayers.  I need some prayers for a few good friends going through a rough spot.  Two medical situations, one husband leaving for a year and a job issue.  I don't really feel it's my place to go into these in detail, but if you have any extra prayers...I know a few people who could use them right now.  I know my list is getting longer and those prayers are being said everyday! 

Teeth??

Yep that's right....1 pearly white tooth breaking through his soft pink gums.  Doesn't that sound awful?  No wonder he's been a little clingy and fussy.  Baby Tylenol did wonders last night and his slight fever is gone today.  So with one poking through, I'm sure there are more to follow. I can actually see the one right next to it, so it won't be long now!

P.S. Where's my spell check?  I am an educated girl...but I need spell check! haha!

Weight check

We had a quick appointment on Thursday to check Patricks weight....and I'm happy to report he's up to 12 pounds 12 ounces! YAY!!! He gained almost a pound. The doctor was happy with that weight and said to keep doing what we're doing. He checked out a few more things and Patrick wowed him with his rolling ability and then we were on our way. It's such a relief to leave the doctor's office feeling like we're doing something right. I love our doctor! He always makes us feel like we're doing right by our boy! We go back in another month for his 6 month appointment. At which the doctor said he'll probably have teeth because (and I quote) he's a 'drool bucket'! haha!! I failed to mention he's been drooling like that for months! I guess we'll see. So that's the latest with the boy!

Cancer sucks

Things with my mom's chemo were going ok. She had some growth on her last scans, but not enough to be too concerned about. The treatment is going ok, same laundry list of side effects, but she tolerates it ok. The drive to Detroit every 3rd week is getting tiresome for both of them. But the drug seemed to be working. Seemed to be doing what it is supposed to be doing. Thursday at her appointment, she was kicked off her study. Apparently the drug company didn't agree with how they read the report. And after several phone calls, re-reads, and discussions with the lead doctor on the study, they are not willing to jeopardize the study results and leave her on it. CRAP. So now it's back to square one. She will do a few treatments here with her old cancer center and wait for another study to open up. They are pretty certain she will qualify for one with no problem. My mom takes everything so well. Just keeps on truckin' and never lets on that this is a big deal....but this is a BIG deal. What if she doesn't qualify for a new study? What if there's nothing new out there for her to try? The old treatment wasn't as effective as it was when she started it. There are other drugs out there but they make her incredibly sick. Needless to say the last 15 months have been a blessing. It was great she was accepted to the study. Great they kept the growth at bay for so long. Great that the side effects weren't that bad. We all knew this was coming eventually, but were hoping it would last a little longer. So for now we wait. Wait for something new. Something better. And hope in the meantime she can continue to do as well as she has in the last 15 months!